Moving on

In other news … I might be writing parts of THE PROTECTOR sequel in a bathroom again. It looks like we won't be staying in Hawaii past this summer. In fact, it looks like we could be making a trans-Pacific + trans-Atlantic move (that is, move to Europe).

As I always say, I'll know when and where we're going once I move into my new house. Nothing is guaranteed, nothing is certain. Well, change is certain in this case :-)

My parents, grandparents and the rest of my relatives would be ecstatic if we moved to Germany (where I was born and raised).

I wouldn't mind moving to Colorado.

My husband doesn't want to go to NC. Or NY or TX.

The kids don't care as long as they get a dog/cat/horse/bunny rabbit or guinea pig when they get there.

I wonder if the Army knows we're supposed to leave this summer …

Writing tip 2: Adverbs

Adverbs are not your friends. They water down your writing. When- or where-adverbs (e.g. “yesterday” or “here”) are okay. How-adverbs (e.g. “slowly” or “fast”) are the troublemakers. Do you really need them? Isn’t there a better verb you could use instead?

Consider this:

… he mumbled hoarsely … try … he croaked …
… she drove slowly … try … she inched through traffic …
… he said aggressively … try … he ordered …

I used to like adverbs. They were everywhere. I put effort into finding the right ones. My first drafts were peppered with them. I can’t remember what made me suddenly see them or why I grew wise to their existence, but now I agonize over stronger verbs instead. Think of them as the fat or sugar in your writing diet; use them in moderation and you’ll be fine.

Bonus tip: If you have trouble paring down your writing, take a good look at your adverbs. Chances are, you can delete most of them.

Yay, I'm done!

It only took a few months, but I’m done with the rewrite of THE PROTECTOR. Whew. I started writing it way back when in late 2003/early 2004. I took me a little more than a year to finish the first draft. Parts of it were written on a toilet seat. I kid you not.

We had just returned from Okinawa, Japan, to the US. The four of us were crammed into two small adjoining Army lodging rooms (think motel), living out of our suitcases. I wrote at night. There wasn’t really a lot of room and I didn’t want to disturb anyone, so I would go into the bathroom, sit on the floor, put my pad on the toilet seat and write.

I didn’t do much with the story in 2005. After realizing it was too short (59,000 words) in early 2006, I went about adding to it. I ended up with 62,000 words and 52 chapters.

As of yesterday, THE PROTECTOR is down to 36 chapters and 55,000 words. I don’t like the low word count, but I do love how the story has changed and grown and worked itself out. I am very proud of it.

If you know how this writing business works, you know I might be done, but I’m not finished with it yet. There’s the line edit still, the checking for typos, grammar, syntax, punctuation, awkward phrasing, lazy writing and the such.

So I’m not finished, but I’m done :-) and it feels great.


PS. I think I have found a title for the sequel. I liked THE GHOST CRAB for its meaning, but it’s a horribly boring title, and how many people know what a ghost crab is? I might go with THE STALKER instead.

Tess's take on "write what you know"

I procrastinated. I had a few ideas for writing tip 2, but nothing concrete. So I decided to look around and see what others were posting. I checked out Tess Gerritsen’s blog.

You can find it here.

And what did I read? In her post titled “But I don’t know anything interesting” she touches on “write what you know” and had this to say:

“Are you … forced to write about what you know? Absolutely not …you should write about what you want to know.”

That’s why I love her blog. Head on over there and read the entire post. Heck, read the entire blog. She has some very interesting things to say.

Writing tip #1: Write what you know.

Sensible advice. Controversial advice. I’ve heard it pronounced worst writing advice ever, but I disagree. Notice it doesn’t say “write what you have first-hand experience with.”

I’m all for first-hand experience, which is why I am dying to take a gun safety glass and shoot a few rounds. Until I have the opportunity to do that, though, I’m just going to spend more time at the library, reading up on handguns, thumbing through magazines for police officers or other security personnel. I photocopy articles and ads. I jot down website addresses and read those “it happened to me last week” anecdotes (almost as good as interviewing someone).

“Write what you know” doesn’t mean I have to own an M9 and shoot it regularly; it means “do your research until you know the subject you are writing about.”

While some writers might think so, “write what you know” does not limit you to write about characters with professions you’ve worked in, living in cities you’ve seen, doing things you’ve done.

The truth is, I rarely write about stuff I “know.” But I make damn sure I know what I write about.

new this year: 50 writing tips and tidbits

2006 was a good year for the whole family: the husband won a Federal Supervisor/Manager of the Year Award in April; the daughter started first grade in July, I signed my first book deal in August, the little guy began preschool in September, and the cat has survived her 13th birthday. Even most of our fish are still with us. A good year all around.

Time to look ahead.

One of my resolutions: to post to this blog more regularly. To this end, I’ve decided to come up with 50 writing tips and tidbits.

I won’t pretend to be an expert by any stretch of the imagination, no worries. I won’t tell you how to get published and/or noticed by an agent/publisher, because I’m not an agent, editor or publisher. I wouldn’t know what goes on in their heads, and I won’t presume to speak for them. I might mention how best to present yourself and your writing, but I think you know that doesn’t guarantee anything.

If you’d like to know what makes agents, editors and publishers tick, what they look for or don’t want to see cross their desks (very important piece of information!), check out their blogs. There are plenty of them. This is not one of them.

This is the blog of a writer knee-deep in revisions, on the verge of seeing her first book in print, struggling to meet the daily needs of her family, her burgeoning writing career, and her body for sleep and food (and exercise).

What are your writing resolutions for 2007?

Season's Greetings

Mele Kalikimaka (Merry Christmas) from the place where we leave sushi and passion orange juice out for Santa (who arrives in a canoe) ...

characters, in 50 words or less

Somewhat inspired by the American Title finalists who are being judged on their hero/heroine descriptions right now, I’ve decided to write my own descriptions (very much inspired by the enneagram workshop I am taking):

Mason: Not only does the obsessively disciplined perfectionist fall in love with someone who mocks his high standards, but he falls down on the job, forcing the man he’s been hired to protect to save his life. He’ll have to relax his standards to keep his love (and sanity).

Soren: With an anti-authoritarian streak as deep as the Mariana Trench, he nearly gets himself killed in an effort to prove his worth and gain control of his own life. Will he give up the impulsive, self-destructive behavior in time?

Boy, am I glad I don’t have to write the blurbs that go with the book. Whew.

Sisters In Crime HI meeting

Sisters In Crime: A world-wide organization of 3400 members, offering networking, advice and support to mystery authors.

We are men and women, authors, readers, publishers, agents, booksellers and librarians bound by our affection for the mystery, and our support of women who write mysteries.

If you love mysteries, crime fiction and suspense, this group is for you!

Come to the McCully Library Meeting Room on Tuesday, November 21, at 7 p.m. McCully Library is across the street from McCully Bicycle on King Street. Parking behind library.

Meet local writers, readers, share favorite books
Meet guest speakers: authors, crime lab specialists, detectives, K-9 corps, and others
Enjoy an evening learning something new and exciting
Share the experience with new friends
Consult with others on writing and publishing questions

Questions? Call McCully Library, 973-1099 or email atkinsond001@hawaii.rr.com


I’m so excited. I’m finally in a group with actual meetings. Well, no, that didn’t sound right. I’m finally in a group that has actual meetings where I can attend them. Whoohoo. Looking forward to it.

to outline or not to outline?

I’m beginning to wonder if I shot myself in the foot.

I didn’t outline THE PROTECTOR. In fact, I was never one to outline, period. Then I got stuck in the second half and started outlining one or two chapters ahead and it got me to the finish line.

Naturally, I thought I’d outline the next book since the outline tool worked so well for the second half of THE PROTECTOR. So I have the first half of THE GHOST CRAB outlined. That book has been on my mind since last fall, that is the fall of 2005.

Do I have to show much for it? Nope. A few chapters, measly word count. I drag my feet. I stall. I rewrite. I edit.

I wonder if I shot myself in the foot with this outline business. It’s like I often hear from other writers. They don’t outline cause it kills the story for them, it takes away the “what if?” factor and answers their questions.

Honestly, I think it’s only part of the problem. It’s not like I know the intricacies of the entire story. I have no clue still about how to get the bad guy or what would give him away. There’s plenty to discover and work with.

I think it’s time I sucked it up, sat down and just wrote the darn thing.

I'm a Seven

We’re probably not thinking the same thing right now :-)

I’m taking this enneagram workshop that deals with different personality types and specifically their flaws (it’s all about the conflict, baby). One of the first things we did, of course, was determine what type we are.

Turns out I am a Seven sharing the spotlight with a Five and an Eight (I took the quiz).

I can’t argue with the Seven. I left home when I was sixteen. I chose a career that all but guaranteed I had the opportunity to move all over the world, I emigrated to the US, changed careers and became the first person in my family to go to college (in a foreign country) and I’ve now lived on three continents. Yep, I’m a Seven, all right :-)

I won’t argue with the Five or Eight either. LOL.

Since you’re confused by now, here the nine types:

Type One is the Perfectionist: these are the people who have very high standards for themselves and for the world. There's never any question about what's right and what's wrong—no gray areas—and there's never any question that they'll constantly try to DO and LIVE FOR what's right. Their motto is "I work toward perfection in an imperfect world," and their greatest desires are to avoid criticism and to be right.

Type Two is the Nurturer, the Helper, the Giver: who loves taking care of other people and feeling needed. They'll go out of their way to nurture everyone around them, always focusing on what OTHERS need more than on what THEY need. In fact, they'll frequently neglect their own needs and wind up feeling kind of hurt that "with all I do for everyone else, what thanks do I get?"

Type Three is the Achiever, the Succeeder, the Performer: these people are very aware of the right image. They're always onstage, projecting whatever the situation requires...you need somebody to fill a particular role, a Three will do it. Success, career, achievement are important to them...no matter what's going on around them, they're gonna look really, REALLY good.

Type Four is the Romantic, the Artist, the Individualist: these are people who love drama and tragedy and falling in love. They have BIG feelings, and they don't like feeling ordinary because that's too flat. Nothing is ever quite grand enough, long enough...they dream about the perfect love, and they're the best at offering wholehearted sympathy when you're feeling low.

Type Five is the Observer, the Thinker: they'd rather be behind a book than out there involved in the world. They like to keep back, keep to themselves, study like crazy (but always from a distance). They tend to "compartmentalize" their lives: work here, family there, one friend here, another over there.... They're proud of getting by with very little, and they're careful about guarding their time and their privacy and their personal space.

Type Six is the Defender, the Trooper: these are the people who get the job done. They're very aware of any possible threat to their well-being or the people they love; they're very aware of the rules and determined to always keep them...or to always break them. (That's the counter-phobic Six, the James Dean rebel type.) Either way, Sixes are very loyal, always on the lookout for danger, good to have on your side.

Type Seven is the Adventurer, the Enthusiast: they want to keep having new experiences, try whatever there is. They're interested in everything and everybody, at least at first glance...and they love to plan things, plan trips, plan new activities -- whether or not they actually carry out those plans. They like to keep all their options open rather than settle for just one of anything.

Type Eight is the Controller, the Aggressor, the Chief: this person is a self-confident, natural leader. They're used to taking charge, getting things done, making sure everyone gets a fair shake. They go after what they want, always keeping an eye out for the people they care about; they're strong individuals who take it upon themselves to defend the weak...kind of a Wild West sheriff mentality.

Type Nine is the Peacemaker, the Mediator: they want everyone to get along and everything to be nice. They don't like conflict; they don't like having to pick sides...even picking chocolate or vanilla. They tend to go along with the flow, whatever that might be; and instead of exploring their own preferences, they like to just kick back with TV or food or whatever's comfortable.

What are you? (Drop me a line if you’d like to see the quiz that goes with the nine types.)

I’m still trying to figure out what my characters are. Mason’s an Eight. James is a Three. But I have trouble pegging Soren. I think he’s a Seven. But he’s a Scorpio, too, and all that passion and drama would almost point to a Two.

National Novel Writing Month

It’s November, and you know what that means: it’s the National Novel Writing Month. The goal of NaNoWriMo is to produce a 50,000-word novel by midnight, local time, on November 30th. The quality of the product isn’t stressed nearly as much as the quantity of words. The idea is to get that novel out of your head and onto a page. You can spent the eleven months between NaNoWriMo to edit and polish and rewrite.

I am SO tempted to participate. I don’t think I’d get close to 50,000 words. I’m simply too busy. My priority is the edit of THE PROTECTOR, closely followed by swimming (my lean & fit counselor would like the exercise to be my priority, but, sorry, that’s just not going to happen). And then there’s the workshop I’m taking on personalities and their flaws (another RWA KISS workshop).

Why would I want to participate then?

I’m a masochist. I need pain! Seriously. LOL. I have a feeling participation is exactly what I need right now: a good motivator, a goal to write towards and the opportunity/freedom to simply write, not plan and plot, to produce work and not wonder if it’s as perfect as I can get it (that’s what December will be for).

The simple truth is, I need structure and goals. I’m a competitive overachiever with a lazy streak. To dredge up a cliché: I can do pretty much anything I put my mind to. The problem sometimes is finding something worthwhile to put my mind to.

Since it’s pouring right now, I’m going to skip swimming (did I mention we don’t have indoor pools here?) today and sign up for NaNoWriMo instead.

Wish me luck.

Ironic

Here I am, lethargic, tired, exhausted, fatigued, drowsy … you get the idea. And what was I working on the last two days? Soren contemplating drugs: amphetamines, methamphetamines and their effect on fatigue (decrease) and energy (increase).

In truth, his contemplation only amounts to a single paragraph in the chapter, but I did read through all my research again.

It’s very difficult to read about this drug, which used to be legal and widely used by people who needed an extra energy boost, while you’re so tired you can’t concentrate or see straight.

Ironic indeed.


PS. In case you wondered why I am so tired: I have chronic insomnia, and I just started a new drug this week. Since I’m a glutton for punishment and eternally hopeful, I like the give drugs a week to prove themselves. It’s only been two days for this one. To say it hasn’t impressed me yet, is an understatement.

PPS. No worries. I’m not tempted to try out amphetamines or methamphetamines. Don’t send me any.

Earthquake

After a week of vog (volcanic air pollution; think smog) and sticky humid weather, the Hawaiian islands were rocked by a powerful 6.6 earthquake yesterday morning.

The earthquake centered just off the coast of the Big Island, Hawai'i island, but it was strong enough to rattle my house on O'ahu.

I was in bed, of course. It was 7 a.m. And I thought a heavy truck was rumbling by my house (unusual, but not unheard of). But the rumbling got louder and the shaking stronger, until the whole house rattled and things started falling off the walls and shelves.

I was up in a flash checking on the kids. My son was watching early morning cartoons, oblivious. My daughter sat up in bed, complaining about her brother shaking her bed.

"Honey, that wasn't your brother."

By the time I got around to putting some clothes on, the house was shaking again and the power went out.

My 3-year-old: "Let's call Handy Manny. He has tools. He can fix things. He can bring batteries for the TV."

Handy Manny, in case you don't know, is a cartoon character. He's a general contractor, and yes, he has tools and fixes things.

I was pretty disappointed. I had had plans for a great writing day. I'd even had playdates for the kids, so they'd be busy and would let me work in peace.

Oh well. The playdates and their mom came over. We hung out. Eventually I grilled some hot dogs and Spaghettios on the grill (in torrential rains, mind you). I am very proud of myself, because that was my first grilling experience. Heidi brought pretzels and carrots. We had plenty of water (we even made tea with grill-heated water), just no power (we got that back in our town around sundown; others are still without power as I type this).

Lessons learned:

having batteries is great; checking the radio to make sure the sizes we have actually fit in the darn thing would have been better
having instant coffee or tea is great, too; having a grill-safe container to heat water in would have been nice, too (I improvised)
scented candles smell nice, but don't illuminate very well
having a good book on hand is key

I am convinced we wouldn't have been as ready and prepared as we were to deal with the power outage and resulting difficulties, if we hadn't survived a few typhoons in Japan where power could be out for days.

My friend who’s vacationing on Maui right now called after the initial quake, telling me they were heading for higher ground in case of a tsunami. I couldn’t tell her anything, because I had no radio or TV, but I figured the warning sirens would be on. Incidentally, we’re safe, because we live way past the evacuation zone and up a mountain.]

The people on the Big Island weren’t so fortunate. There was quite a bit of damage. Sinkholes and mudslides don’t sound like much, but Hawaii island is very rural and if your road is destroyed there isn’t anywhere else to go.

All in all, we did okay.

Self-promotion

Two days ago I stood in the parking lot of my daughter’s elementary school, waiting to pick her up, when the PTA president sees me. She’s in her car across the parking lot. She yells a greeting. I wave back.

She: “Hey, didn’t you write a book? How is that coming?”

Me, beaming: “It’ll be in bookstores in the spring.”

She: “Great. What kind of book was it again?”

I notice heads swiveling in my direction, moms and dads and grandparents. They look at me expectantly.

Me: “A romance novel.”

Satisfied most people tune out. The PTA president waves and drives off.

Later, I kick myself.

***

Yesterday I had lunch with a bunch of ladies I didn’t know (I had to attend an educational function). Someone asked me what I worked.

Me, beaming: “I’m a writer.”

Heads swivel in my direction. Six women ranging in age from early twenties to late fifties look at me with curiosity.

“What do you write?”

Me: “I used to be a reporter, but now I write fiction. In fact, I just finished a book that will be available in the Spring.”

“Oh?”
“Really?”
“Wow.”

Me: “Yes, it’s a gay romance novel.”

“So, uh, what does gay mean?”

Me: “It’s a novel about two men.”

“So, uh, two men. Is there, like, uh, a damsel in distress?”

Me, thinking of the chapter I just revised and Soren saving Mason’s life: “In a way.”

I explain a bit more about the story. I offer my reason for writing gay fiction. We discuss the concept of men in vulnerable circumstances (the “damsel”) and books in general. Right before the lunch break is over, six women whip out pencils and paper and ask me for the name of the novel and if they’ll find it at Borders when it comes out.

Bottom Line

“Bottom line, will the story that goes to print be the story you wrote??”

My friend LaConnie just asked me this over the weekend. You see, LaConnie just sold her first book – Congratulations! – and she had some questions about the revision process.

I imagine there are quite a few writers who cringe when they hear “revisions.” I read an interview where the author likened the revision process to driving bamboo splinters into his eyeballs while tearing his novel apart, chapter by chapter.

Ouch.

LaConnie’s question made me realize how comfortable I feel with Seventh Window. I like working with Ken *waves*. He answers my questions, and he explains stuff. His suggestions and comments come across as just that, suggestions and comments. He manages to focus my attention on just what’s missing or unnecessary in whatever chapter I am working on.

Bottom line: He’s not making me write a new novel based on the original. He’s helping me polish the original’s rough edges.

And I’m happy to report he does all that without the aide of bamboo splinters :-)

The Sea Sprite

It’s only fair that I post a picture of The Sea Sprite as well. Here she is:



The Sea Sprite really is a Krogen 58 and “the new flagship and the first of the next generation of trawlers from Kadey-Krogen Yachts.” She was specifically designed with liveaboard comfort in mind, which was why I chose her for Mason.

Nice, isn’t she?

Can men write romance novels?

Interesting blog on Romantic Times. Stupid question. Of course, men can write romance novels. Good ones, too. If you have a chance, check out the blog and article it was inspired by.

Yes says Ray Connolly (and I agree). No says Liz Hunt. But she says more than that, and I’m still shaking my head over some of her notions.

“ …there is a brooding, obsessive, all-consuming passion that every woman – if she is being honest – aspires to be the object of at some time in her life.”

Huh?

I’m being completely honest, I swear: no, thank you. When I think brooding, obsessive, all-consuming passion, I think stalker and restraining order. I think control freak. I think man who cannot handle a strong, independent woman with friends/interests of her own. Trust me, even as a doe-eyed, innocent (don’t laugh) teenage girl I wasn’t swooning at the prospect of brooding, obsessive, all-consuming passion.

Oh, and why can’t men write romances? “…it is only another woman who really knows how to deliver [brooding, obsessive, all-consuming passion]because she has been there – or would like to have been there – too.”

Yeah. Uh huh. I’m sure no man has ever longed for a love and lived to write about it. This is as insulting to women as it is to men. I’m beginning to feel sorry for Liz Hunt (I admit I don’t know who she is). She must not have any caring males in her circle of family members, friends and associates.

Then she goes on to say this:

“Women writers are better at detail, too – and details are essential in creating a romantic build-up: what he wore, what she wore, how they were standing, how they moved, how they touched.”

What?!

I see. That’s probably why I don’t care to read traditional romance novels. I always skip the parts where the clothes are discussed. I couldn’t care less what brand shoe the heroine wears. Dropping men’s wear designer names doesn’t do a thing for me either.

Seriously, what is this woman thinking? Male (romance) writers can’t be detailed? I think it’s safe to assume that she hasn’t read any gay romance novels, the kind written by men. We all know the characters populating those romances don’t move or touch. They don’t dress and undress. We never learn what their apartments look like. Oh, and they never ever yearn for someone to shelter them or love them.

Rubbish!

Revision update

I celebrated the passing of the sub teacher exam (with a 97, no less) by cleaning my desk off all things non-Protector and cleaning out my inbox. Then I tacked up some inspirational pictures on my corkboard :-)

Like these:





The Rock. I can’t say that I was a fan of his when he wrestled, but I saw his movie The Rundown right around the time I started writing The Protector and I couldn’t help but think that Dwayne would make a great Mason. And so his picture is tacked up on my board next to the picture I have of "Soren" (I originally shared his pic here, but the young man in the photo contacted me and asked to have it removed, since he'd stopped modeling) and, my, they look good together.

With those two staring down at me from my wall, it's easy to work on revisions. I did finish chapters 1 and 2, and I have to say I like them a lot. The first paragraph of chapter 1 is still off (yes, Resh, I’m working on that), but the rest came along very nicely and is fun to read.

I started working on chapter 3 and my brain, happy to have something to do that’s not sub teaching related, is mulling over chapter 4.

All in all, revisions are going well, and I am not pulling hairs out by the roots just yet. I have a feeling I might not ever do that. I’ve never minded revisions. In fact, I like the rewrite/edit phase much better than the initial writing phase.

Must have something to do with me working better when I have a clear understanding of the finished product. In the writing phase there is so much out of place and up in the air and unresolved, I can get flustered. Luckily, that’s what they invented outlines for :-)

The rewrite has begun!

THE PROTECTOR is now officially in revision mode.

I’m excited and terrified. Where is that quote I had about writers and courage? I want to pin it on my message board.

But I am so looking forward to holding the finished product in my hands, which are sweaty right now, by the way. I’ll keep you guys informed. If you think you might want to have a copy, preorder to get the 25% discount, because once April 2007 comes around and the book is in print, the discount won’t be no more.